20/12/11

There are many kinds of sad - some are good, not all are bad :')

It's been a great 2.5 years in Kampar. After so many farewells, both in groups and with dear individuals, it's finally dawning on me that I'm leaving.

What can I write which may contain the breadth and depth of what I've been feeling, thinking, doing, witnessing and experiencing in these past few weeks, let alone the last 30 months?

Maybe I can explain how I feel. I feel a bit sad, and very moved. I also feel very humbled. A lot of great things have happened here in Kampar - and although one might say that I was deeply involved and active in these things, here at the end I feel more like I have been a spectator. I am a witness of the work of God. A servant also. That is all.

Maybe I should also talk about my thoughts for the future. Nothing's certain, but I have a lot of reassurance, a lot of hope and a lot of confidence that things will work out for the good.

And I pray that my brethren can also share in this hope.

Another adventure! And the hope of joyous reunion :)

Partnering Up

I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I  always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now.

Apostle Paul, Philippians 1:3-5

I've been thinking about partnership recently. Have you, like me, ever wondered about the relationship between the work of God and the work of a man of God? Is there a line between these two, and is it drawn? Are we, by using our effort and intelligence, trying to do God's work on our own? Perhaps we should just confine ourselves to a room all the time and pray that God will act directly in the world. Wouldn't that be great faith? 

I think the key here is the idea of partnership, where the work of God and the work of Man has a symbiotic and harmonious relationship, under the good graces of God. 

The truth that we are made partners and fellow co-workers (1 Corinthians 3:9) is a staggering one that may be hard to take at first. How can we do the work of God when we are such silly little beings?  The Almighty God, creator of the universe, being in partnership with us?

But when we understand that God is working through us and Christ is living in us, then a lot of things make sense, and the tension disappears. What we thought was a boundary line is in fact overlapping circles, having been reconciled to God through Christ. This partnership paradigm is crucial for a Christian, and it has a great bearing on how we treat things.

We are partners with God in the Gospel. That is amazing, that we have some part in spreading the news about Christ's salvation for all. 

We are partners with God in our friendships, too. As a friend, I must seek to strengthen and build up my friends in a way that is in line with God's will. In other words, great reliance on God and alignment with the teachings of Jesus. God can do this on His own, but He lets us be partners and take part in it too. God is never out of the picture in true friendships- indeed, He is in the very center of it.

We are partners with God in our Relationships (with a capital 'R'), too. With God's express permission, we enter into an exclusive and special relationship with another person, and we take upon ourselves a shared responsibility - over the other person's welfare: emotional, spiritual, physical or otherwise. And the other person does the same for us. Truthfully, these things are God's "territory", but He lets us to take part in it too. It is a great honour and should not be treated lightly. 

God is never out of the picture in a Christian relationship - indeed, He is in the very center of it. As a couple's relationship is strengthened, so is their relationship with Christ, because they know that they are partners with God in this. They understand very well that they do not replace God in their partner's hearts. Even as they look to each other's needs, they recognize that God is the ultimate supplier and enabler of all things. 

Whatever things work out for good will be lifted up in thanks.

I think it's crucial to remember that we partners in God in the things we do and the relationships we have. If we remember this, then we'll save ourselves from making many of the irresponsible and silly things that we do. God is in the business of redeeming and building up His children - as partners with Him, we should not be tearing others down through our actions and words, as many are unwittingly doing. God alone deserves all worship - as partners with Him, we should not be eliciting 'worship' from others (few will admit to this crime).

Repent. 

Just a few of my other partners 

Do you want to partner up with God? Let me know if you do - lots of steps to take first before you can do so.. and my blogposts are too long as it is hehe.

Superpowers!

Spiderman is a good guy. Everybody likes Spiderman. 

Your friendly neighbourhood Spiderman?

You should also know who the 'Green Goblin' is right? He's the bad guy in the first Spiderman movie. He does bad stuff and Spiderman tries to stop him.

"I tell you ah.. I'm a bad guy"

Actually hor, the two fellars have a lot in common. They both have superpowers, bestowed to them because of some experimental sciency bla bla bloo (accidentally, in Spiderman's case). As a result, they can have super strength, reflexes, endurance,etc. In Spiderman's case, he shoots web out of his hands - and I'm not talking about the world wide kind of web.

What sets them apart is obvious: One uses his powers for good things. The other, for evil.

There's a lesson to be learnt here: We need to be careful how we use our superpowers. How we use it determines whether we're the good guy or the bad guy. I'll assume that anyone reading this would rather be the good guy. Ahem.

We may not have powers like Spiderman or Green Goblin, but you have to believe me when I say that we all have powers, and while they are not as "fantastic" as those we see in superhero movies, they are definitely significant and have far reaching consequences.

Some people have great musical gifts. With their musical gifts, they can package edifying messages and send them to the world. Or they can choose to instead market inane, even negative messages. These things affect the mindsets of listeners. They have an effect on society.

"Baby, baby, baby ooo~"

Recently, I've been thinking about my own powers. People tell me that I can *ahem* sometimes use my words really well. 

Being conscious of this is very important! I need to be careful that I use my powers for good. I've been extra careful about what I say recently. If my words do have power, then I must make sure I'm using it to build people up, not tear people down.

And I need to be sure that I'm really building people up! Meaning, I have to strengthen people so that they can stand on their own and find God. Sometimes, encouragement may give a semblance of strength to a person - but in reality, we are making the person have to rely on us more and more - which I think is not real strength. I want to be reliable, but not to construct situations where people live off me, because that is not fair to anyone. I will not set myself up as an idol.

It's disappointing, but I see other people who have powerful words do this to others. Even (and I'll receive a lot of flak for this) in the church. In my mind, it is a form of enslavement. I will live according to the true principles: that the truth of God sets us free and with our free choice, the only one worthy for us to be in bondage to is Christ. 

Paradox? I know :P

My commitment is this: that my words point people not to myself, but to Jesus. 

What are your superpowers? And are you using them for good? Think about it!

Context

When it comes to understanding a message, context is absolutely vital.

What is context? Without getting technical, Context can basically be said to be the situation in which the message occurs. Saying, “I love you” means different things in the two following contexts:

1) Just got dared to say it to a random girl on the street.

2) Childhood friends who have gone through thick and thin together, sitting under a full moon on Valentine’s day with fireworks spreading across the sky in the distance. (Okay, exaggerated abit)

The words are the same, but the message meaning is of a completely different degree and type.

----

Anyway, I’ve been thinking a lot about context lately, and about how we need context when we want to tell people things.

When we tell the truth, we also want people to be persuaded of it.. but they often are not, in spite of the truth value of our words. 

I find that this is normally because of context.

For example, when we tell people the truth that Jesus loves them, it doesn’t make sense unless we speak this truth in the context of love – like a loving, honest relationship. That is why we are not only told to speak the truth, but to do so in love (Ephesians 4:15)

God will ultimately be the one to make His love real to His children, but I am convinced that He wants us to help one another in this too. Probably because, to a being who is in very nature Love, it must be pleasing to God not only to have His creation love him, but for love to abound amongst His creation too.

But anyway, I am just musing.

We need to ask God to help us with our contexts. Let me tell you what He has done for me. 

I’ve often found that I need to be a comfort and assurance to people - - for anyone from my closest friends to near strangers. And you know what, there's no way you can comfort someone if you yourself are anxious. And there's no way you can be an assurance to anyone if you yourself are filled with doubt and fear.

That being said, I’ve nearly always found myself endowed with some sense of supernatural assurance that would naturally be beyond me. I am, by nature, an anxious person who over-thinks matters. Yet, when the need arises, I pray and God provides me with comfort so that I may in turn be a comfort to others.

This is an incredible, humbling experience for a nervous wreck like me - so much that I often go home after such conversations with great peace like a river in my heart. With God’s help, a context of assurance and comfort can be created, and hopefully, the message gets across a little.

After all, (and I’m telling myself this) what shall we worry about? If God is for us, who can be against us? I draw no assurance from the things of the world, but stand on the promises of God only. 

And if I should be so caught up in things that I forget this, I know for sure He’ll send me those dear friends and angels to give the same timely reminder of His love, wrapped in their own context of love. 

Now isn't that great :)

A Friend

I think we all know what it means to be lonely.

Some of us generally work that way, and it becomes something we get used to. Some of us feel it creeping in slowly from time to time and try to find companions to compensate.

Or some experience it crashing down on them so suddenly that it leaves you breathless.

I'm like that.

It is so illogical and unreasonable that I resent it. But it's there.

Loneliness, roaring like a lion.

Lean on Me!

Everybody needs to depend on other people. Yes, we do that, even when it’s bad for us. We seem to be hard wired that way.

But the problem is, people are inherently unreliable, right?

Everybody makes mistakes that can hurt the others around us. Sometimes we even do such things intentionally, out of our negative emotions.. Ever got caught up in the spur of the moment?

This is why forgiveness is so crucial. Forgiveness has no value where there is perfection, but in the imperfect reality that we are part of, forgiveness is the one thing that can save.

Jesus demonstrated  this – big time – on the cross, when he let himself be killed for the forgiveness of our sins, which are against God and against each other (which, in a roundabout way, is against God too)

Now He’s alive again, and asks us to live like how He did until the time comes for His return:

Forgive each other!

Do not take revenge for yourself!

Love your enemies!

Can you hear His word?

Ultimately, we still need to rely on people. But if you ever find that people are just too unreliable, you can still trust in Jesus, who is perfect, without blemish (I don’t mean in a L’Oreal kinda way) and is ever present in the lives of those who put their hope in Him.

The peace and security that comes from Jesus will eventually give you the courage you need to trust other people too. You know that even if others let you down, our dependable God will be there to lift us up. David said, “Though my mother and father forsake me the Lord will receive me” (Psalms 27).

Parenthesis: I don’t mean that my parents have been forsaking me (Hi Ma and Pa!), they love me a lot. But in some people’s case, it’s true. The evidence is that apparently David wasn’t treated very well in his family – being the “runt” and all that.

So ah, if you got ears, listen! Rely on God first – you will find in Him a sense of security that will transform your lives. The stronger your relationship with God, the more able you will be to forgive and trust people without fear. Guaranteed. (And by the way, you can't have a father-children relationship with God unless you accept Jesus first, because only Jesus can make us acceptable to God the Father)

Just pray to accept Jesus into your life and let Him take control. His perfect love casts out all fear (1 John 4:18), and sets us on a path of a new life, filled with love, truth and the Spirit. 

2AM

Technically, I should be sleeping.

Awakened by the rumbling of my stomache, I had risen from bed an hour after midnight to get something to eat.

I don’t know if it is the solace of the hour, the steady hum of the fluorescent lighting interjected with the tweeting of crickets, or the wafting aroma of freshly pan-fried sausages – but right now I’m feeling a kind of peace I think I haven’t felt since I arrived back in Kampar last week, on Monday.

This peace – some call it God.

A hint of a frown visits my brow as I recall the past week. It’s been a variegated fortnight for me – my own exercise in devotion and discipline was interspersed with lapses of attention, slips of ill discipline, and patches of erratic emotion. True and genuine repentance in some ways have not been set in my heart. It is an awkward thing to be set between the flesh and the Spirit: they are at war with one another.

Predictably, I now come to the list of things I’ve committed myself to. Dear reader, if at any point you may experience a sense of déjà vu, do not be alarmed. I feel it all too well. It is perhaps a testament to the fallen nature of Man that we troubles constantly resurface themselves.

FYP, cell group, Intro to Chinese, church, transport ministry, Christmas production, Powerman, PBIM and Nike Run.

Clearly, I have to time this to perfection. I know that this can be done, with a mixture of discipline, wisdom and determination that far outstrips whatever I’m currently in possession of.

Well, well, it’s all too obvious what God wants out of me under these circumstances. Last chance for me to cultivate discipline, self-denial and endurance before I graduate.

Can I do it? Or shall I fail miserably? Speculating about the outcome won’t help, but I take comfort in something else: It’s good to know that Jesus is by my side at all times.