Humm Humm

These days I sing to myself a lot. It's a great comfort to sing songs, don't you think! Any westlakers if you ever feel down or anything u can call me. I'll bring my guitar and go to you and we can sing hymns together la la la. Or if you feel happy and want to sing oso boleh

It's a long road to freedom,

A winding steep and high,

But when you walk in love with the wind on your wings

And cover the earth with the songs you sing

The miles fly by.

7/11/09

Hey everybody, yeah I'm here.

I've been tinkering with my blog the past 10 minutes (as you can tell, not that much effort into it) but now I gotta handle my assignments so yeah.

There were some things I really wanted to blog about actually but well, those things sort of got resolved and lost it's relevance to the moment. A bit sad because I guess it was good blogging material (don't we bloggers sometimes come across things in our daily life that we feel - "Hm, this would look good on the blog"?) but well, my real life is obviously more important and it's quite a blessing that I've settled matters.

I'm happy, are you?

The Devil In Yellow.

I'm not going to post Digi pictures on my blog since maybe it could amount to copyright infringement. So for those who don't know about it, go google 'Digi' images. When you see the fat yellow and bald yellow men (aliens?) then you'll get the idea.

"I will follow you.." is their catchphrase but I definitely wouldnt want one of those creatures tailing me anywhere. >:-[

So I finally got a Digi number. And I'm keeping my Maxis number at the same time.

I tell you, if you want to study in Kampar right, you need to have a Digi number, or you will die. Out of my 40 coursemates, I can count the number of Maxis users with the fingers on my hands.

Now if you are wondering why I would need to subscribe to different service providers, you are probably not Malaysian haha. Just to illustrate, under my Digi Campus plan (for students) any message to another Digi user would cost 1 cent (and we can choose 11 friends and family that we can message anytime for free, provided that they use Digi) but any message to a different network like Maxis is 15 cents.

CAN YOU SEE THE GAP! And the price difference is about the same for Maxis too. It's like both Maxis and Digi are both trying to kill each other and at the same time, some of us are getting caught in the crossfire.

Now, I'm pretty upset about the collateral damage but I have to admit, Digi Campus is pretty sweet. I use it to call or message all my digi friends now and in a week where I felt I messaged quite a lot, I've used exactly 98 cents. One week. 98 Cents. Convert that to monthly rate and what do you get? And I got a free Digi umbrella which is actually very nice except that it shouts DIGI everywhere you go.

So this is sort of a win-win-win situation. (Upgrade from the traditional win-win situation)

I win because I save money, my Digi friends win because they can message me at a much lower rate, and Digi wins because they get another customer. Damn them. Lol.

Anyway I have to wield two phones nowadays but its ok, cos I don't want to kill my Maxis friends and more importantly, my family uses Maxis so we can call each other.

FMA

Recently I've been reading a manga called Full Metal Alchemist in my spare time. Not that I have much, but I normally it's one way to unwind I guess.

The world in the comic book (I somehow dont like saying 'manga', i know theyre supposed to be different from comics but I treat it like a comic anyway, just that its from Japan) is some fictional world whereby somehow humans are able to tap some kind of natural energy in the earth's crust and, through some use of symbols and drawings, use that energy to manipulate matter. In that they manipulate the elements present to instantly form new things that are composed out of the same basic materials.

The story line is particularly dark. As the story rolls on the plot expands very impressively like quite an incredible detective saga. The writer?/artist? somehow manages to thrown in lots of cute humour and just a bit of romance too. The underlying concepts behind the "alchemy" that the protagonist uses are in reality very far-fetched but is somehow presented in a manner that is believable, adding greater value to the experience of reading.

The story and its characters make several astute comments about human nature, but besides that, as a Christian I was reading it and obviously there are certain things that we would find unacceptable to subscribe to. The life-view that is championed by the protagonist and his allies is highly humanistic in nature, which is admirable, though considered as untrue according to the strictest Christian principles.

In a sense, I feel that Christian view is more pessimistic than the Humanist view. While the latter exerts all effort in trying to maximize the potential and the goodness of all humans in the world, the former believes that humans (and in effect, the world) are already inherently fallen, and it is not by our effort that we are made perfect, or are saved from ourselves. Rather, the only possibility of redemption is to be found in 'God', as he is not human.

(this explanation is brief, and the point of view I am speaking from is not often used, but if you think about it, it makes sense, I hope)

I have tremendous respect for people who try to better themselves, you know. And people who struggle with the moral depravity of the world and try, through their actions and their words, to impose the ideal or at least make the world a better place. I believe such people live with perennial frustration, as they struggle not only with the world but with themselves, as they constantly probe themselves - being all too aware about how easy it is for humans to be deceived (be it by others or by themselves).

I've given up this road because I am convinced that the answer cannot be found by humanly means, but it takes tremendous spirit and guts to keep it. The kind of spirit and guts that I don't have, on my own, frankly.

I yearn

..For the absolute clarity of a moment, like the sensation of breaking out of a cave into the daylight.

On the Brink.

I write this post about one hour before kick-off of what is billed to be this season's defining match, from Liverpool's point of view, at least. (yes this post is about football, sorry ya)

In 40 minutes I'm cycling out with my friend Chyuan to go and witness the clash at Anfield.

There's probably nothing as shaken as a Pool fan's faith in the team this season. We've lost 4 in a row and we appear to look like crap in every department of the team. Even our own fans have begun to unknowingly work against us. A budding little supporter (probably not old enough to even remember Gerard Houllier's time), in the fullness of match-day spirits, somehow contrived to throw a beach ball unto the field which somehow contrived to be hit by Darren Bent to score a goal.

According to the laws of game, the goal should have been disallowed (everyone recognized this only after checking the rulebook). The ref screwed up. On a day when Liverpool screwed up, for the ref to screw us is just too harsh to believe. Double screwage.

I think somehow at the back of our collective minds we feel like the whole universe is pushing against us and our strength is waning. Number 19, gone in smoke?

To be a Liverpool fan is to know melancholy.

Those golden moments.

On days when our own words fail us, we can always turn to kindred spirits, (even one who lived so, so long ago) to say what we wish to say maybe better than we could've said it ourselves.

"Yes, but greatly against my will, especially my inward and carnal cogitations, with which all my countrymen, as well as myself, were delighted; but now all those things are my grief; and might I but choose mine own things; I would choose never to think of those things more; but when I would be doing of that which is best, that which is worst is with me (Romans 7:21)"

Replies -

"Do you not find sometimes as if those things were vanquished, which at other times are your perplexity?"

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"Yes, but that is seldom; but they are to me golden hours in which such things happen to me"

- John Bunyan, The Pilgrim's Progress